Monday, May 24, 2010

Once Upon a Time, There Were Three Little Angels...

This summer, several of the international incarnations of Vogue have decided to grant an angel (or three) their wings by slapping their pretty faces on their covers.

Of course, (as is always the case,) the three Victoria's Secret fluttering beauties took to the skies with varying degrees of success:

One flew, one flapped, and one hit the plane glass window.

Let's see which angel did what:

Alessandra Ambrosio, Vogue Nippon July 2010

Now, I may have a bit of the Prada-bias working against me here, but I think this cover is serving it up to me by the piping-hot spoonful.

- Her wild, untamed hair is perfectly contrasting the rigid structure of that overlay garment, 

- The font color compliments both the silver chains and the violet sheen of those crystals,

- And Alessandra is pretty much vogue-ing it up by framing her face with her hands like that.

I mean, she's literally Vogue-ing for Vogue.

... Need I say more?

 Adriana Lima, Vogue Spain June 2010

The next angel, while equally beautiful, isn't quite as successful in her resulting cover shot.

Our Brazilian beauty looks like she just escaped the torrid embrace of her Spanish lover, making it appropriate, nationality-wise...

(To me, it looks more like an album cover for Spanish love songs or a trashy Spanish romance novel.)

Also? I'm not digging the fact that both her eyes and her mouth are only half-opened.

It makes me wish someone during the shoot had just told her: 

"Girl, choose a face hole and go with it. This hazy-eyed, lazy-mouthed thing that you're working... well, isn't working."

But then, maybe it had been an exhaustive shoot, leaving Adriana about ready to face-plant right into that Spanish street corner... 

I'll withhold judgment, just in case.

Doutzen Kroes, Vogue Russia June 2010

Lastly, we have the Danish angel, Doutzen, spreading her (still-wet) wings for the Russians.

... Derp.

This looks like a photo-shopped cover of an Interview magazine, trying desperately to pose as Vogue.

For the hair? We have... wetness.
For the accessories? We have... scuffed-up gold bangles.
For the outfit? We have... something turquoise with butterflies, I guess.

... But hey, at least she's committed to fully opening both her eyes and her mouth!

(Yeah, that *smack* you just heard was baby birdie Doutzen ending the pain with a one-way trip into a closed window... Don't worry, she's in a better place now. She has her wings.)

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